Worsemovies

Now, we all know that Mr. Seagal made his fair share of bad movies (you could easily fit his complete filmography between 2002- 2010 in that category and you wouldn’t be wrong) but this isn’t about that. It’s about something far more fascinating. You see, by the middle of the 90es Seagal contract with Warner Bros. was almost up and someone in the TekMagic company decided that the time was right for him to cross over to the new kind of media- video games!!!

Original preview of the game

Now, ludicrous as it sound, those were the days of action movies and fighting games so it kinda makes sense… a little bit. And then it all goes haywire! Caption was done by Karateka and teacher of women’s self- defense unable to replicate even one Seagal trademark move (Seagal is mostly known as a practitioner of Aikido, and has a 7 Dan black belt in the art). In fact Greg Goldsholl managed to replicate only Seagal’s trademark pony-tale and that’s where all likeness stops.That combined with the lousy controls, sub- par graphics (even for the 90es), and only 2 kinds of enemies (poor scientists and almost as poor Nanotech mercenaries).

Look at him go!

Seagal license did bring a lot of interest but game failed to meet it’s initial ’94 release date, was later moved  to PlayStation and N64 and renamed to even more Seagal-like title of Deadly Honor but again failed to come out in ’99  and was soon after officially pronounced dead. Here you have the opportunity to seem what could have been. First the official plot…

Steven Seagal is a legendary runner, but commanders dislike his loose style and contempt for rules. His partner Jack Fremen, was killed on their last mission. There is no evidence to support it, but many wonder if he might still be alive had Seagal followed orders.

Trish Morgan, another veteran runner, has been assigned his new partner. She’s tough as any but has the attitude that commanders look for.

Now, the rebels will attempt the ultimate mission: an assault on Nanotech’s main campus. High command nervous about Seagal. They know he’s out to avenge Freman’s death. But he’s the best chance they have.

He’s the only choice…

(If you still don’t get it- Seagal and SF don’t mix)

…and when you’re done you can enjoy some of the surviving gameplay footage. And don’t forget to enjoy Seagal’s hillarious screams of death- you sure won’t find that in any other medium he tackled!

PS There’s also an urban legend (at least partially true) that at some point Goldsholl run into Seagal on a Martial Arts seminar and after bragging that he played him in the video game he got his arm twisted and cried like a baby. So, I guess Seagal wasn’t a fan.

PSS You can now play the game prototype here thanks to PlayNesOnline: http://www.playsnesonline.com/play-steven-seagal-is-the-final-option-prototype-online/?play=true#ads1