Worsemovies

There are plenty of movies which drop a spotlight onto evil things and beings that kill people (Killer Clowns for example). Most of them are using various phobias as a base for a script. Inspired by that someone in Netherlands (Dick Maas to be more precisely) came up with an idea of making horror for claustrophobic people. So, here it is folks, the killer elevator movie! The movie about diabolical elevator!

As it goes, we see 2 drunk middle-aged couples having fun and deciding to go into the rooms. Between 3 elevators all 4 of them choose the middle one. Then the lighting strikes and causes power failure. After power came back, the elevator gets stuck and air valve goes bad. It is interesting too see different reactions of the people trapped within it. As one couple clearly starts suffocating the other couple grabs each other and starts having sex for no reason (we get some nice boobs shot here) until they pass out unconscious eventually. Luckily for them, the staff of hotel finds them before they died.

MILF stuck in elevator

Felix Adelaar (played by Huub Stapel) is a workaholic technician from the elevator company Deta Liften. He had been called by hotel management to look into a problem with elevator. But for now he couldn’t find anything suspicious. So he goes back home to his wife Saskia (played by Josine van Dalsum) and their children. Later that day we see elderly blind man (played by Onno Molenkamp) signing some sort of contract with hotel manager. What is bizarre here is that his mother is still alive and blind man rushes to give her a call. As he came near the elevator, it opened it’s door leaving just a shaft for poor blind man to step into carelessly (he should have learned how to use his cane until now). It would seem that blind man struggles not to fall to shaft. But no. He just wanted to get hold onto his cap which had fallen off his head. After he grabbed it, blind man willingly falls into his death. This scene has no sense at all! One thing is certain tho: His mother is going to outlive him for sure. And you might say blind man wanted to take his favorite cap with him to a better place.

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x5hgxu7

 

But that wasn’t the only victim of the evil elevator that night. One of the security people dared to poke his head through elevator doors to take a peek into the shaft. You might guess what happens next. If your guess was “decapitation” you were damn right. Here is your reward! Only for your sick  twisted amusement:

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x5hgz0t

 

Time to call Felix again. He rushes back to the hotel despite Saskia’s constant nagging. She doesn’t have any apparent reason for that. She is just a bitch. Anyway, Felix is back and he meets Mieke de Boer (Willeke van Ammelrooy), a rather horny journalist for De Nieuwe Revu, a local tabloid that Felix remarks he often finds in his friends’ cat litter. Mieke smells something fishy here (although that might be Felix). When inspections reveal no apparent problems with the electrical system, Felix becomes obsessed with the continuing malfunctions of the elevator. Now comes the comedy aspect of this movie: Felix is obviously imagined as “maverick cop who plays by their own set of rules”. The exchanges with his boss (who wants the elevator-caused incidents covered up to
avoid souring an upcoming corporate merger with another elevator-manufacturing company) are  hilariously reminiscent of heroic rogue cops arguing with their desk-bound superiors in countless movies. he even tells our dogged repairman “I’m pulling you off that route!” in the spirit of the line “I’m pulling you off the case!” in cop movies. Of course, Felix continues investigation on his own time. The elevator-manufacturers conspiracy shall be uncovered! He might be onto something since When he paid yet another visit to the building, he noticed outside a van for Rising Sun, a manufacturer of microprocessors for automation. Felix and Mieke, after collection newspaper article archives about Rising Sun, try to meet up with the company’s CEO, but the CEO begins to act
nervous and answers abruptly. He visits previous lift repairman who went insane and ended up in a nuthouse (?). No luck there. Next, Mieke takes Felix to meet up with her former university professor who specializes in electronics. The professor explains microprocessors’ sensitivity to external factors, such as electric fields, magnetic fields, and radioactivity, which undermine the proper functionality and tells about a computer built years ago which had suddenly begun to self-program and went out of control. A complete rubbish if you ask me.

Microchips are watching us

Meanwhile, THE LIFT continues with it’s pranks. It tried to lure the little girl into it’s shaft. The girl was alone since her mother was having a sex with the owner of hoel back in his office. The girl screams thus luring her mother out. Fortunately, only the girl’s doll had been smashed. Her mother gave her a strong slap instead of trying to calm down her poor daughter! (That’s what you get when you interrupt your mom’s sex life) Anyway, the lift’s hunger must be satiated! It killed cleaning guy who was tap-dancing too close to shaft. Serves him right!

Spring cleaning

The next morning, Felix is summoned to the elevator factory by his boss who angrily suspends him for his unauthorized visit to Rising Sun. That evening, the owners of Deta Liften and Rising Sun have a meeting inside a car, and reveal that the elevator’s controller, made out of organic material, is going rogue by killing people in which makes them nervous. It turns out that Rising Sun’s CEO put an experimental control chip in the elevator, one which can reproduce even! (This is signified by it dripping gelatin) What a fucking dumb explanation! Soon enough, Felix’s wife leaves with their children and, feeling that he doesn’t have anything left in his life, decides to solve the elevator conspiracy. Gaining inside the building during the night, he climbs into the shaft and starts beating on the chip with a wrench; it responds by trying to smash him. Slutty Mieke comes to the rescue, dragging the wounded man out of harm’s way. What happens next should leave you scratching your head, or whatever body part it causes to itch. Rising’s Sun CEO shows up with a semiautomatic pistol, unloads an entire clip into the control panel, then turns around and enigmatically states, “It was very sick.” But the lift will have it’s final word! It shoots one of the broken cables out to drag CEO inside the shaft and hangs him. The monster has killed it’s creator! As for Felix and Mieke, they decided to take the stairs while the elevator’s heartbeat can be heard in a background. And I doubt Felix has seen his wife and children ever more. Good for him!

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x5hh0q0

 

Conclusion: Dick Maas tried to make urban thriller in one environment we can’t avoid. Instead he ended up with something between cheap B-horror movie and black comedy. Maybe I missed something but I can hardly be blamed. I do not speak Dutch and English translation seems to have been written by people who have never heard human beings actually conversing, Since this film was imported from abroad you get the old-school bad movie fun of the dubbed-in dialogue never coming close to matching the lip movements of the actors speaking the lines. The dead-pan demeanor of our hero Felix, whose straight-faced reactions to all this absurdity help make the film so damned laughable. The plot itself is as absurd as it is. How can a microchip multiple itself by just dripping goo? And why it has to be evil? Is the hidden message here that all intelligent beings are evil? This is what you get when you combine new elevator with the evil of Stephen King’s Christine. Personally, I believe all of this havoc could have been avoided by placing plain “Lift out of order” sign.