Posts Tagged ‘Linnea Quigley’

Bad hairdos, dire fashion sense and a pumping soundtrack from John Farnham, can only mean one thing; We are back to 80’s! (although WM crew never left 80’s). Time for some revenge – girl style (and I am not referring to any of “GF revenge” porn movies). We at Worsemovies are well aware of what our audience is aspiring for. So without further ado, in cooperation with Danny Steinmann (Friday the 13th: A New  Beginning), for all of you sickos out there who, for some reason, wanted to see Charles Bronson in a dress, we present you – Savage Streets.

 

Following her appearance in The Exorcist and its less than popular sequel, Linda Blair made a career out of exploitation flicks of which this is perhaps the most famously trashy. She plays Brenda, a typical LA girl who leads all-girl gang “The Satins”. Like any other ordinary girls they like to hang around the L.A streets while sipping fruity alcohol and gossiping. They have a run-in with a gang of thugs called “The Scars” who were hitting on them but unsuccessfully. Girls steal and trash their car, and that’s when entire problem begins.

Women driving a car! Run for your lives!

Gang swings by to school in order to get revenge on girls for stealing their car. They try to bully some guys but they end up kicked out of the school by Principal Underwood (played by John Vernon). So they have to lie in wait for another opportunity. It didn’t took too long. They waited for gym room to be emptied so they could drag Brenda’s deaf mute sister Heather (played by Linnea Quigley) to the shower room and gangbang her there. And since Heather can’t speak she couldn’t tell her sister who was behind that. Nor Brenda had any suspects despite the fact it was so obvious considering her recent activities. That evening she went to the bar to party and drink with her friends like nothing had happened. But the gang is there as well. Can you guess whats happening next? That’s right! A bar fight!

 

liAs if one fight wasn’t enough for her Brenda ran into another fight, this time with her slutty classmate over some guy. Nice chick fight, when we can see some nice tits. As a result of that Brenda gets  suspended from the school, after unsuccessfull Principal’s attempt to hit on her. This scholl knows no bounds, I can give them that.

 

Still, not everything is so black and sad. One of her friends Francine (played by Lisa Freeman; known for Back to the Future) is getting married soon. So, while Brenda and the rest of her girl gang are visiting Heather in the hospital, Francine and Maria (played by Luisa Leschin) are going to pick up Francine’s wedding dress. On her way home Francine gets intercepted by gang. They chase her with the car. I thought they just wanted to scare her. But for reasons only known to him, the leader of the gang Jake (played by Robert Dryer) threw Francine off a bridge with words “Here comes the bride”. In the middle of the day with full traffic going on behind him! And no one bothered to stop! Vince (played by Johnny Venocur) freaked out and ran away to the hospital, where he found Heather lying in deep sleep. He tries to apologize her, admitting everything. Right in that moment, Brenda came along and heard entire confession. Now she freaks out at Vince and he runs away. Brenda finally got some clue.

Later that evening she busts into Vince’s house with knife. There he tells her about Francine. Apparently, Brenda didn’t find out that her best friend is that for entire day! I guess she was too blinded by her anger and revenge even to check out how preparations for her friend’s wedding are going. Anyway, she spared Vince and starts preparing for taking revenge girl style (and no again, it is not what you think it is). Dressed like a commando and armed with a crossbow which she bought at the local store (just like that) she went to a warehouse where the gang is gathering and hunted down Fargo (played by Sal Landi) and Red (played by Scott Mayer). Meanwhile, Vince tries to flee town but Jake runs him down with his car. Wanting to celebrate another successful hit, Jake comes to a warehouse where he finds his dead buddies. Brenda was waiting there as well. After some fight she manages to kill Jake by setting him off on fire (or at least a doll that should represent a living man). Police arrives on the spot and not a single question was raised so Brenda is off the hook. Now she has enough time to attend her best friend’s funeral. She wasn’t interested that much in her wedding tho. And that’s how this movie ends

 

Conclusion: This is a perfect 80s exploitation film for all those who are cult film fans, it certainly won’t win any awards but good-golly this is a ham covered, rock n’ roll, crossbow firing good time. It tries to operate within just about every single exploitation subgenre that was active at the time simultaneously. And of course, there’s an amazing amount of tit shots in this one, even by the standards of the 80s. And apparently it’s a film that isn’t bothered about the fact that it’s set in a high school. “Savage Streets” isn’t even approaching a good film in any way and Blair’s performance could be one of the worst ever by a former Oscar nominee. But it is ridiculously entertaining at times and any film that features the line, “I wouldn’t fuck you if you had the last dick on Earth!” is one that I can’t help but defend.

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First prize is… DEATH! Second one too.

 

Now, as we all know the  best thing about the 80’s is the fact that they were flooded with slasher movies ever since the surprise success of the first John Carpenter’s Halloween. In the sea of Michael Myers, Jason Voorhees and Freddy Kruger movies there were naturally a few oddballs like: The Prowler, Silent Night, Deadly Night, The Funhouse and Hell Night  but then you have something like the Fatal Games– a movie that is a unholy union of a coming of age sport drama and a slasher. You know you’ll get something special  with that concept.

Falcon Academy of Athletics that prides itself in producing and nurturing an Olympic– level talent in a number of sports. And it couldn’t be more confusing when the movies starts with a super- motivating 80’s music. You want to jog or lift weights right away.

Shuki Levy feat. Deborah SheltonFatal Games

Just listen to this shit!

After a super- boring speech and some gratitous nudity we get to the  first and best kill of the movie. The weightlifting girl is overjoyed and in the middle of impressive military  press  when she gets impaled almost super-humanly to the wall.

Those leg warmers didn’t help you, did they?

 

That’s a really unique way to kill a person, very different from the usual close range attack of other Slashers. And the strange thing is the killer keeps prowling around and bodies keep piling up yet nobody seems to notice.  Then we have the nurse complains about the Doctor shooting too much steroids into kids. The “good” doctor doesn’t seem fazed by it, he insist they must go on– man,  he must be some cousin of Dr. Mengele. Most of the kids continue to train not suspecting anything but javelin thrower seems suspiciously mad.

Trivia: this lady received a Golden Globe and was nominated for an Oscar in ’87 surprisingly  not for this performance

 

Nurse begrudgingly accept and continues working with students, which also consists of giving butt massages.  Also she casually informs Annie of the new program for her- retardation injection!!! That’s because the Dr. is concerned with her developing a bust– go figure. Man, even steroids are great compared to this.


They finally realized that the weightlifting chick is missing, a black girl too… It took them long enough to finally call the cops but  cops don’t actually manage to do anything. Parties and highschool drama continue, including  but not limited to a stupid blonde loosing track and field (and crying to her lesbian- looking coach) , and Annie reacting horribly to the retardation drugs. I wonder why?

Also Annie’s boyfriend menages to break a leg- literally and epically and seemingly gets out of the competition. Maybe this will save his life?

He really did…

Back on the field  for some reason the javelin thrower is still pissed as fuck. Unfortunately it doesn’t get better for him, ’cause he ends up stabbed himself. Not too long ago he was throwing the javelin but now he ends up meeting his maker because of it, how ironic.

I’d really like to know how they filmed this. It shoots so straight.

And the javelin killer keeps keeping on. Now instead of shooting the swimmer from the edge of the pool (some of the tribal people still catch fish like that) it turns out the killer is in the pool, squba-suit and all. And he stabs her from the floor up. Ok, I wasn’t expecting this.

smrt plivacice

Boyfriend turns out to be super dedicated, he actually climbed trough the window with the cast on his leg! He even managed to find bunch of the murder victims neatly packed in the student’s lockers.  But javelin killer doesn’t show mercy- ever- it  even killed the crippled guy! I don’t think I ever felt sorry for the slasher victim in my life.

Annie survives attack and ends up the school’s infirmary. Then it turns out that the real identity of the killer is- the school nurse!  Man, Annie can’t catch a break! Now the explanation, the nurse was originally- a male nurse . She was disqualified from the Olympic game after her sex- change operation became public. Wow, I would have never guessed this.

She just left this laying around…

The chase continued and now her voice turned deep, like super- John Earl Jones deep, how does she do that? I mean she’s taking hormones she’s not possed by a deamon, right? Amy tries to escape by climbing onto the construction but nurse waits for her at the top. Unfortunately for her Ammie  pushes her and she goes straight down… right onto the trophy-well,  she finally got what she wanted!

Lesson of this movie is: always do the best you can because if you do the best you can- you’ll get impaled on the javelin. So, I guess- never try.

 

 

 

 

We are back to the good old ’80s slashers (personally my favorite genre). We just can’t say no to cheesiness, gore and a lots of tits. Especially when it is about two demented hot chicks having a party and one of them is the screams queen Linnea Quigley. Another interesting fact about this creatively titled movie is that it had been made when slasher  craze was going out of style. So let’s see where this leads to.

Murder-Weapon-1989

The movie starts with a wordless, pointless 10-minutes intro which actually made me wonder if the filmmakers couldn’t afford sound equipment. During this intro we see a hot brunette oiling herself near the pool for entire five minutes, then leaving to the room to have sex with her boyfriend, just to be assaulted by teenage blonde girl after her boyfriend left and went to have a shower. And yeah, he was killed by blonde under a shower in another sex scene.

It turned out this scene was a memory flashback (just the first of many) of blonde girl. Her name is Dawn (played by Linnea Quigley) and she was committed to asylum for many years. Now she is having a conversation with her shrink about her releasing. There we find out that she was touched by her mobster father when she was a little girl, that she made a deal with Amy, who also ended up in nuthouse after her boyfriend was killed by Dawn, that whoever gets out first is going to throw a party when the other one comes out. Now, the shrink is obviously a pervert which helped Dawn to achieve her wish of becoming party organizer by blackmailing a not-so-good-doctor with a sex tape. Yup, doc actually didn’t have much care about professional ethic  since he had Dawn molested during their hypnosis séances. Not much after, Amy (played by Karen Russell) had also managed to “convince” Dr. Randolph (played by Lyle Waggoner) to sign her release form. It occurs to me that Amy wasn’t quite the victim in gruesome crime Dawn had committed since she holds hatred for men as well and she is obviously a feminist (though, I have never seen anything even remotely to hot feminist chick). Oh, and Amy is daughter of mobster as well. Anyway, both Dawn and Amy have finally gotten out of nuthouse which means it is a party time!

Seriously, a feministSeriously, a feminist?

And what kind of girly party it would have been if there weren’t for a boys? Dawn and Amy had invited all of their ex-boyfriends. Now think about it. Two certified crackpots who hold a grudge towards men are throwing a party for themselves and inviting their ex-boyfriends? Call me paranoid but it seems to me that there is something more to it. Something sinister. Muahahahaha. Man, who would be dumb enough to attend such event? Well, I guess we are going to find out that soon. First ones to come were Cary, Kevin, Jeff, and Billy. They were all at some point in the past in relationship with either Amy or Dawn. Cary (played by Allen First) was first to reignite the flames of old love. He displayed a remarkable lack of any male dignity since he jumped immediately to shave Amy’s legs during which she dreamed about cutting his veins. At least it wasn’t without purpose. Yup, he managed to score and pass out of exhaustion after that act. Amy’s comment when she found Cary laying on the floor was “Shit, I think I fucked him to death”. Not many such modest girls these days.

He forgot to shave his wrists

Meanwhile, Dawn and Jeff (played by none other than Eric Freeman from Silent Night Deadly Night 2; although he was credited under a different name Damon Charles) are having their own exhibition in Jeff’s car. Dawn had no problem with fucking with him in convertible but backed out after Jeff (who is Richard Grieco wanna be) asked to perform the blowjob. We can see some nice pair of tits here as well. Back inside Billy (played by Richard Sebastian), after following a trail of Amy’s flirtatious look, ended up in the basement with his head smashed by sledgehammer in this hilarious scene:

He is got PHD – Pounded Head Down

Who could have done such a horrible thing? Was it Eric (played by Michael Jakobs Jr.) who was seen arriving at party moments before Billy’s head was flatted to the ground? I wouldn’t place my bet on him. He is just a pathetic overconfident singer of metal band with a retarded name “Chainsaws”. And he is also one of the Amy’s ex-boyfriends. Just like Cary (who btw went to recharge himself with a dose of good old speed), he hurried up to reignite the old flames. But we won’t be seeing any sex scene between them. What we will see is a sex between Dawn and her friend Bart (played by Rodger Burt) who died instantly after in a Alien related scene for which I have absolutely no explanation.

I guess she learned in asylum how to tie a knotI guess she learned in asylum how to tie a knot

Now the killing spree is starting. Next victim is poor Cary who just wanted to have some late night snack. But instead of food, someone had his throat stuffed with a broken bottle of Champaign. From behind. Hm at least he doesn’t need to worry about dangers of drugs using anymore.

narkoman

Jeff and Kevin (played by Stephen Steward) have found Cary’s body. Forgetting their roles of tough guys they started to panic and make a wild assumptions about being targeted by mob hitmans. They even assumed that the murderer had already cut phone lines without even trying to call a cops. Instead they went to one of the cars in which they found a gun. Just when it seemed that lady luck has finally smiled upon them Jeff somehow had transformed himself into the mannequin a moment before the murderer had blown his head in another ridiculous scene.

Masks started to fall off

Kevin decides to team up with Eric (not Freeman) and Amy in order to stop the killer. Well, it is not that he had much of a choice. They finally started suspecting who might be the killer. The Final confrontation took a place where it all had begun – in the basement. Two bulked up guys with guns barely managed to overpower tiny girl with the help of Amy who previously splashed the killer with gasoline. The ending then is written by itself. Or is it? Kevin approached the steaming corpse and removed a mask from it’s head. Scorched face of Dawn appears, she opens her eyes and starts choking Kevin. And that’s the ending that leaves a plenty of room for a sequel. Which luckily never happened.

If you see this girl run for your lifeIf you see this girl run for your life!

Conclusion: From the movie in which the killer was the most suspicious person from the beginning and half of it’s crew used fake names (even the director David DeCoetau used strange alias Ellen Cabot) you can’t expect much of a quality. Dialogues are hilarious. Plot attempts to be deceiving with frequent flashbacks like it wasn’t so damn clear who is the murderer. I can’t help the feeling that the hidden message here is some feminist crap about girls power and all men being a pigs (which I am proud of). That’s probably the reason why director took a girly name as his alias. More likely the message is that pussy is the  MURDER WEAPON. But it is not everything that bad. Yes, the movie is a complete piece of trash, we could all agree on that. But it is also very entertaining flick, consisted of all slasher elements such as nudity, sex, gore and cheesiness. Worth watching.