Posts Tagged ‘Eric Roberts’

Eric Freeman (Silent Night, Deadly Night 2, Murder Weapon, Young Rebels ) was one of our inspirations for starting this page in the first place and for the longest time he was a mystery wrapped in enigma. After decades of obscurity Eric Freeman finally resurfaced in 2013  and even more significantly he finally returned  to acting (after 18 years) with logically- a Christmas themed movie: A Husband for Christmas, also staring Eric Roberts, Vivica A. Fox and Ricco Ross in 2016 and then episode od CBS’s Bull  recently in 2017.

 

Wishing us all the best for holidays and also promoting his new website:  http://www.theeericfreeman.com – up and running starting this December! You can order lots of fun stuff including a Garbage Can with his picture on it!

…and just in case  you want some more of those sweet Freeman guitar licks we got one for for you. Check this out:

 

 

 

 

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Now, I’m a big fan of the Kazahstani cinema, not ’cause I think directors are overly talented but for the sheer fact that they approach film-making like the kid collecting the stickers- they try really hard to collect them all.

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And then you have things like Olivier Gruner (Nemesis, Alien Interceptor), Mark Dacascos (Crying Freeman, Brotherhood of the Wolf, Agents of SHIELD), Martin Kove (Karate Kid, Rambo 2, Assault on Devil’s Island), Cary Tagawa (Mortal Kombat, The Man in the High Castle), Eric Roberts (Runaway Train, Best of the Best, Raptor), Billy Zane (Titanic, Phantom), Michael Jai White (Spawn, Black Dinamite), Bai Ling (Age of Hobbits,The Crow, Crank 2), Kevin Sorbo (Hercules), Kristina Loken (Terminator 3), Armand Assante (The Odyssey, Prophecy) and Danny Trejo (Machete) all working on the same freakin’ movie!

And it’s about manhunt + reality TV mix with a fare share MMA action to boot- who can say no to that?

 

Now that you’ve enjoyed the trailer, prepare for more Kazahstani goodness ’cause we are expecting another offering from them this year and that’s The Whole World at Our Feet with unlikely mix of Armand Assante, Peter O’Tool and Bolo Yeung!  Hope they never stop doing what they do.

 

 

 

Deadliest Prey (2013) is still red hot but David A Prior is at it AGAIN! It turns out he made two films back to back, first being the fables Deadly Prey sequel and the next one being possibly even more intriguing Relentless Justice. Yes, the title evokes a “Seagal’s revenge thriller” (practically a genre of it’s own at this point) and that is not too far from the truth, but the revenging is done here by a lovely lady Leilani Sarelle (Basic Instinct). The rest of the cast is also more than impressive, having veterans like Eric Roberts (Runaway Train, The Dark Knight and everything in between), epitome of awesomeness Mr. Wernon Wells (Commando, Mad Max: The Road Warrior),  Sherrie Rose (Tales from the Crypt, Unlawful Entry), Lisa Lanloia, Tara Kleinpeter and of course Ted Prior (Priors always come in twos).

465721_446676465360564_1563110891_oTurn away, nothing to see here!

The Plot: Former Australian Intelligence operative Victoria Dev Ries (Leilani Sarelle), lives a quiet life in suburban America where as a single mother she raises her only daughter and trains fighters in her own M.M.A. gym. But when her daughter (Mimi Michaels) goes on a camping trip and fails to return, she is forced to go back into action. It would seem that a handful of people, including the Mayor and his girlfriend (Vernon G. Wells & Lisa Langlois) and Sheriff (David Campbell) along with a handful of others have a rather strange hobby. They like to hunt people for fun. And they are rather good at it, but when it comes down to hunting Victoria, they need help and so they bring in another former Intelligence operative, Joe Mangine (Mark Rolston) to balance the scales for them. But this may not be enough because for Victoria the only justice she knows is Relentless Justice.

460558_446673925360818_514048331_oShe made a promise to kill him last… she lied!

Enjoy the trailer and we’ll update you on the release date as soon as we find out. Good to see Prior Bros. firing on all cylinders!

For more information like he official Relentless Justice page on facebook- https://www.facebook.com/pages/Relentless-Justice/378610885500456

In 1993 Roger Corman produced a cash in off Jurassic Park, the infamous Carnosaur (see the previous post). As you might have guessed it was the worst imaginable rip off of the said film- with it’s sole original ideal ( terrible one at that)- combining dinosaurs with their small and simple descendants- chickens! Either way the above mentioned movie had couple of equally terrible sequels and then the franchise finally died never to return again. Or is it? In 2001 the B movie guru decided that the time was right  or another dinosaur flick so he just took the footage of his old Carnosaur film (and couple of it’s sequels) spliced it with a soft core porno scene and added Eric Roberts  (thankfully not in the porno scene).

First we have death of teenagers directly lifted from from Carosaurs. Being drunk and horny teenagers fall easy prey to the dinosaur who makes quick work of them. What is the meaning of this? We’ll find out soon enough. Sheriff , Eric Roberts is on the case, along with ugly blond chick, wildlife reserve Marshall or something. Roberts advises his young daughter (also a secretary) not to mess with the deputies and next thing you know we get something like 20 minutes of  sex out of nowhere.Young couple (including Robert’s innocent daughter of course) finally gets interrupted by a dinosaur roar! When the dude goes to check  on the situation he gets mauled by a stop motion toy dinosaur which then attacks the sexy secretary. Secretary escapes in the last possible moment but the car ends up  under the bridge.

Marathon sex scene …including 4 times repeated booby licking scene

Roberts finds his porno daughter  but she is  in the state of shock and is almost comatosed (I guess we won’t see her humping other deputies any time soon). He goes to pick up the ugly blond chick- and doesn’t seem too concerned with his daughter’s condition. Meanwhile  an Evil scientist/boss sends his fledgling in the laser room (???) where he gets eaten alive by the mysterious T-Rex Aplha. Roberts investigates the evil Eunice Corporation (manufacturers of chickens by day, cloning super smart dinosaurus by night* Ironically smart dinos is the idea that was later re-used in the second part of much more successful franchise of Jurassic Park.

            Alpha T-Rex enjoys clubbing in his free time

After learning that doctors name is Dr Hyde (hell yeah!) Roberts begins to suspects something.   Ugly blond chick wakes up the porno daughter with a recording of a dinosaur roar (that she has in her possession for some reason. She explains what happened in a funny whiny voice and the doctor finds her delusional. Then blond chick gets all worked up and tries to get on top of Roberts but he decides that he would rather break into the evil corporation headquarter than plow her. But we still get to see her in her lingerie.

Black deputy decides to do some work without his fearless leather Roberts and as with any supporting character of African descent he gets ripped apart by an evil creature. He gets to wound the dino in the process so giving the circumstances we can call it a small victory. Also he is 10 years younger in that scene which suggests another borrowed scene from Carnosaur.

Ugly blond chick examines the deputy’s corpse and finds a dinosaur tooth. After that Roberts is determent more than ever to bring down the Eunice Corporation. Roberts  serves Hyde a warrant and he of course denies everything  and talks some donkey poo about us being genetically  related to cats! Blondie accuses him of cloning dinosaur a he pulls a gun at her… and Roberts being a gentleman surrenders. Hyde captures them instead of just offing them right there.  Military decides to stop him, because they first started the project and don’t want to be involved in a scandal. They call Delta Command (unfortunately without Chuck Norris).

Hmmmmm…

In the meantime the Robert’s got a ace up his sleeve. He put lady deputy/secretary in charge of shutting down the power in Eustice in the case they don’t come back in couple of hours. in the meantime Marines land of the premises all gang ho mood and  then you know the shit hit the fan. Without the electricity the cool lasers that keep dinosaurs at bay disappear and the army of super- smart dinos start destroying everything in their path, mostly marines.Commander smartly decides to simplify the mission and blow everything up.

WARNING: DON’T USE ELEVATORS WHEN DINOSAURS ARE ON THE LOOSE!!!

Military chick tries to get a helicopter in the air but strangely there is a dinosaur on the back seat!!! Helicopter of course drops down and explodes but succeeds to kill one of the evil scientist in the process. Sheriff teams up with the Delthas and they work together to get past dinos before it’s too late. Also two of the soldiers go all genocidal on the dinosaur eggs and get the big mommy T- Rex on their feet- to make thing even worse. Evil Dr. Hyde seemingly escapes just to be decapitated by a mommy T- Rex- who experience the similar fate when Roberts jumps in to save the day with a bulldozer). Facility finally blows up, soldiers go away and Robert takes the ugly blond chick home for some gradituos sex we presume …and all is good with the world. Or is it?

Just keep hammering away and soon enough you’ll be extinct too!

To this day I can not understand how this blasphemy managed to win an award (if there is still anyone who counts Emmy as award) and be nominated for Golden Globe. This version of a wonderful and extremely interesting Homer Epic had started wrong from the very beginning. First mistake – Armand Assante as Odyssey. I don’t know who came up with idea of casting a Italo-Irish man to play a Greek hero but I do know that that person should bear consequences for his actions. Assante’s accent combined with his attempt to sound Greek turned out to be a failure of epic proportions. In 85% of the movie Assante is totally incoherent and people who ought to understand anything are forced to turn on their speakers to a maximum and then press ears onto it (tho, due to the awful script they still won’t be able to understand a thing).
Anyway, let’s continue. Odyssey’s wife, Penelope, gave a birth to a baby in a record time of 2 minutes. Also there wasn’t any fluid, blood, umbilical cord or any other thing which are present at any normal giving  birth to a human being. Also, the fact that the baby didn’t cry after being born is very disturbing and confusing.

Can’t argue with that…

Next one of many, many, many wrong things in this movie is representation of Hermes who is messenger of the Gods and son of Zeus. His appearance in this movie had implemented a new, until now never seen category A FLYING FAGGOT! I don’t know where the urge to represent the son of supreme Greek god as nothing else than a plain homo came from. Someone in the crew had some strange issues.

Next, the vampire effect. Odyssey had spent 20 years on the sea and during that time almost all the characters look the same. Neither Penelope, nor her mother,  nor her wooers who invaded her house  aren’t getting any older. Apart of their son, who had grew up a bit. Penelope look exactly the same, with no wrinkle on her face. She still refuses wooers who are now using her house as a some kind of bordel from hell. Her dedication to remain loyal to Odyssey is really impressing due to fact that he already cheated on her some 2500 times by my account.

Screwing up some of the adventures Odyssey had. Cyclops event more looks more like a comedy than a danger. Assante had friendly conversation with a Cyclops, talking and laughing and such. Then Cyclops without any reason eats a half of a member of  the Odyssey’s crew. Next 2 seconds are followed by screaming and disbelief  just to see everything turning back to normal a mere moment later. Odyssey continues his friendly and nonchalant chit-chat with the Cyclops. The rest you can see above.

Next two and a half  hours are followed by “nothing happens” and  “something almost happened”, until the moment Odyssey come home and slaughter literally everyone who happened to be there. Strange thing is that not a single drop of blood had been spilled  in all of that massacre.

Conclusion: My advice – Don’t watch this garbage. Better read a book.

Sad but true